Why is it that the chick with the corner office has to have the stigma of ‘that bitch with the corner office’? Why the aggressive anecdote about her and apparently her outward demeaner? Can she not rise above the ranks unless she herself is aggressive, bitchy, selfish or downright mean? Or is it she must have clearly ‘worked’ her way up to that position, because clearly… I mean just look at her, she is far too young and pretty to be smart, charismatic, talented and kind.
Can a leader not lead by example of respect, goodwill towards all, and still be a woman? If she has an opinion that differs and shares it, is she just bossy or combative? If she is a hard-worker and a mom, is she just a ‘bad mom’ because she works so hard and clearly must be neglecting her kids or is she too selfish to care for them? If she is an executer, is she just someone who is trying to show off or is there maybe, a slight chance that she is just a hustler looking to kill it in the workplace because she is driven as a person?
Oh, and God forbid she is actually pretty too! Even the slightest favor becomes a sexual inuendo or flirtatious, because if you are a woman, and a sexual being at that, apparently helping on a project is your way of cheating your way to the top.
Bump that! You can absolutely be a ‘hustle hard’ kind of chick and still have a dope soul!
Every single leadership book I have ever read, and there are a lot, reiterates to lead by example. To be respectful, approachable, hard-working and not just a delegator, smart and resourceful, and to be to those what you want in return.
If someone were to call me aggressive, I say, yeah sometimes when I feel I am not being heard for whatever arbitrary reason or when timing is critical, and we really just need to get to the point. And then I would also say, ‘thank you’. I am more than okay with being viewed as aggressive rather than weak.
If someone were to say I was not prioritizing my children, I would say, ‘Yeah… Sometimes it really does suck and the ‘mom guilt’ is a real thing… but that both my children are healthy and fully loved… and if they don’t like my success then maybe they just need to get better at time management themselves?’ Because although not easy, it can be done. Some delegation is required, and you may just have to get outside help with the dusting, but totally doable. And for those that choose to be a stay-at-home Mom… God bless you. I think that is just as hard and just as wonderful. I will never tell another mom that regardless of her choice she is any less a ‘good mom’ because of it and nor should any of you.
And if someone were to say that I smile a bit too much or am a bit too flirtatious, I would say... ‘I’m so sorry that you are so sad and don’t smile enough’. I will always walk-in kindness to everyone unless they prove me otherwise no matter if it is a male or female that I am interacting with, and I am not going to apologize for it.
I will lead by example the very best that I can. I will fail many times, but I will always dust off, pick myself back up, and give it everything I got again. I will learn from my mistakes. I will be a kind friggin human being and remind myself every day that there is nothing that special about myself that makes me any better than any other human being but still allow myself to be confident in my abilities and what my uniqueness brings to the table.
I am a woman. I am strong as hell, tough in all the right ways, smart and creative, empathetic and kind, hard-working and a hustler going after my goals, and a dope soul with depth and uniqueness to top it off.
As a woman, we need to make sure we too recognize the strong among us and not hold each other down thinking there is only one spot at the top for a woman amongst the sea of men. We need to simply break those barriers and prove that agility and talent is the only pre-requisite for the corner office. Then we need to make sure we share that view with all those who helped us get there.
“Tamo Junto” in Brazilian Portuguese means “We’re Together” and I came across it recently. I love it…like I want to embody it. To me though I like “Juntos nos levantamos” it means ‘together we rise’ so let us Chica’s rise together, lift each other up, and prove that a Hustle Hard kind of chick with a Dope Soul does exist and in great numbers too! So, you go girl, and get that corner office… hustle hard but don’t forget to share that view from the top. I promise it gets better when you have someone there to share it with.
Comments